10 stupid questions people usually ask in obvious situations and some answers. Go get them…
01. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/friends
Stupid Question: Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer: Well,it’s so hot, there were no cool cabs, so I thought I’d watch some advertisements in the cool comfort of the theatre.
02. In the bus: A fat girl wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet
Stupid Question:Sorry, did that hurt ?
Answer: No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia… why don’t you try again or should I try this time.
03. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask.
Stupid Question: Why, why him, of all people.
Answer: Why? Would it rather have been you?
04. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter.
Stupid Question: Is the “blah, blah, blah” dish good
Answer: No, it’s terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occasionally also spit in it.
05. At a family get-together. When some distant aunt meets you after years
Stupid Question: Munna, Chickoo, you’ve become so big.
Answer: Well you haven’t shrunk.
06. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask.
Stupid Question: Is the guy you’re marrying good?
Answer: No, he’s a miserable wife-beater, insensitive lout… it’s just the money.
07. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call.
Stupid Question: Sorry. Were you sleeping?
Answer: No. I was playing cricket for India at Sharjah and just when you called, Salim Malik was betting with me that Pakistan would win. What do you think?
08. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair.
Stupid Question: Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer: No, its autumn and I’m shedding…
09. At the dentist when he’s sticking pointed objects in your mouth.
Stupid Question: Tell me if it hurts?
Answer: And while I’m telling you, you tell me if I bite.
10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks.
Stupid Question: Oh, so you smoke
Answer: No, it’s a miracle… it was a chalk and now it’s in flames!